She Has a Halo
by vintage1983
Summary: My 1st song fic, so reviews really appreciated, written for XTimeGirlX's shuffle challenge to Halo by Texas. Alex is still in her coma within a coma and the others gather at the hospital.


_This is my first song fic for XTimeGirlX's shuffle competition, also ended up with a nightmare of a song selection, not been easy this one! On top of that it's my first non-smutty effort! Done my best with it though. The song is Halo by Texas; check it out if you don't know it as any younger readers may not be familiar with it (showing my age with that one!). _

_I don't own anything._

**She has a halo**

**Bright light city  
you're her religion  
Superstars in their own private movie  
Play just like children**

Alex knew that none of this was real, she wasn't really awake, she hadn't made it home and for all the precious moments she had shared with Molly in this place, it wasn't enough. It was just the same as waking in 1981, knew it wasn't real, the gaudy glare of the 1980s, the world her mind had created for her. Her own world, full of those imaginary constructs. Imaginary constructs, not real, not people. She tried to convince herself that any attachment she felt to any of them, to Gene, was no different to the emotion a good film could extract from you. You could care about characters in movies, just the same way as she cared about them. Sam's world had fascinated her and now some how she was drawn into her own version of it, and that was it. It was all a game her mind had created and this, the place she was in now was a coma within her coma world, nothing was real. She had to have faith, believe that she would get home, fight to stay alive, to truly get home to her daughter.**  
**

**Lies that take her  
Places she's never seen  
The kiss and tell of it all  
To her seems so obscene**

Gene's face flashed up on the monitor, this time muted, she couldn't hear him anymore, he was less angry now, a sadness in his eyes as he mouthed words to her she could not hear. Instinctively her hand reached out to the screen and she stroked his cheek. She wondered what it would be like between them if she got back to him, their relationship was fractured, was it beyond repair? She choked back the first sting of tears, as a crumpled and dishevelled Gene spoke silently to her from another place. Truth, lies, it all rolled into one. Secrets and lies had brought her to 1981, the lie of how her parents died, and now ironically it was truth that had brought her here. She had spilled it all out to him, trusted him, hoped he would have understood. How could he possibly understand? It didn't make sense to her at times, 'I'm from the future', it was madness. **  
**

**She's so pretty her hair is a mess  
We all love her  
To that we confess **

**She has a halo  
We really do adore her  
For she has a halo  
Can we touch her **

**  
**Ray, Chris and Shaz waited in the corridor outside the intensive care ward at the hospital. The clock inched round, like time had slowed to a virtual standstill. It had been silent for the longest ten minutes of their lives. Shaz put a comforting arm around Chris; Ray leant against the wall, taking a long, slow draw on his cigarette. Finally a stocky matron marched purposefully down the hall way. She stopped and examined them with suspicion. "You lot here to see DI Drake? Look like coppers to me," she said sternly.

"Yeah, we are, can we see her?" asked Shaz softly, her eyes tinged with a tell tale redness.

"Right, one at a time then, I don't need to remind you that this is intensive care, and you can get that fag out as well," she said snatching the half-smoked cigarette from Rays mouth, "this is a hospital, not your local boozer and Alex is very, very ill." Chris and Ray exchanged fearful looks.

"Go on, Shaz, you go first love," said Ray. She gave him a glum smile and nodded, slowly drawing herself to her feet, squeezing Chris' hand before she made her way into the austere side room. Alex lay still, her eyes closed as if in a gentle sleep, the only sound that of hospital equipment beeping and whirring every few seconds. Shaz smoothed out the now matted soft brown curls that tangled around Alex's face.

"We need to sort your hair out Ma'am, don't want the Guv seeing you looking like this," she said, taking a wide toothed comb from her bag and gently untangling Alex's hair, "can't have your hair in a state." It seemed so insignificant, yet it was an important act of care. Shaz sat down on the chair beside the bed.

"You know Ma'am, when I was in hospital, I felt like I knew you'd been there, I don't know what you said to me, but I knew you were somehow. Doesn't make sense really. Anyway you've always believed in me, and you have to wake up, CID won't be the same without you. You can't leave me on my own to deal with that lot of Neanderthals. We're all sorted for the wedding now, should see my dress Ma'am, you'll be there though." Shaz reached out and took Alex's limp and motionless hand. "Don't worry about the Guv either, you know what he's like, that temper, it'll all be forgotten about by tomorrow. I should go, the boys are here and who knows what trouble they're causing, Ray'll be chasing nurses up and down the corridors, or getting told off." Shaz sighed she hoped it had done some good, talking to her was all she could do, "bye Ma'am," she said softly taking one last look, as she turned to leave.

Shaz stepped out into the corridor, Ray and Chris looked hopefully at her. She shook her head. "Go on, lover, you go next," she said. Ray grimaced as they hugged each other and Chris made his way into the room nervously. He approached slowly. "Ma'am, it's me," he said quietly. "It's Chris," he clarified. "I dunno what to say, but we need yer to wake up, the Guv's in trouble, but yer 'ave to wake up anyway." He hovered at the bed, unsure of himself, of what to say, or do, wishing Shaz was in there with him. After a long and thoughtful pause he continued, "after I did...what I did, it was you that talked me into coming back in, I was ready for running. You helped me put it right wi' Shaz, gave me a chance. I won't forget that. I know I let you down, let the Guv down, Shaz, Ray, everybody, but I'm gonna put it right now. Anyway Ma'am...I should...yer know," he pointed toward the door.

Ray wasn't looking forward to this. He shuffled uncomfortably as he entered the room. He scanned his DI, still peaceful, serene, and rather beautiful. Her good looks hadn't gone unnoticed by him, but he very quickly understood that it would be running the risk of standing on the Guv's toes if he opened his mouth any more than he had done on the first day she arrived. "Yer know Drake, I couldn't stand you when yer first turned up, telling us what to do, like bloody Tyler. I knew it, 'ave the Guv wrapped round yer little finger, first day." He reflected for a moment. "I got blown up, was in 'ospital, that were Tyler's bloody fault, but I got better, an' you will n'all. I meant it, pain in the arse, but our pain in the arse, wouldn't be the same wi' out yer." He cleared his throat, fearing he was coming over all girly, thought it must be being around Chris and Shaz all day turning him soft. "the Guv needs yer, they're after him, Drake, you 'ave to wake up and put em' straight. I'd better go." He stopped and drew in a long breath before he stepped back out, composing himself. **  
**

**For her blindness she sees much further  
Like on a wide screen viewing going down on her**

It was a psychologist's dream, to get this much of an insight into her own personality, to really understand herself, hold up a mirror to herself and what made her tick. Yet, she couldn't make any sense of it. So much of that world belonged to Sam, so why was she in it? It felt so real, just like this place did, like the child she held and called her mum. Sometimes when she thought about going home, it was 1982 that she thought of first, the flat, Luigi's, it was him, Gene. If she had asked to go there, 'put in for it' as Gene had once told her, what did that mean? She shuddered the thoughts away, too much to think about, as Gene's face once more appeared on her monitor. 

**She's so pretty her hair is a mess  
We all love her  
To that we confess **

A familiar face appeared peeping out from behind one of the heavy hospital doors.

"Guv," said Chris with enthusiasm.

"Keep yer bleedin' voice down, I'm on the run 'ere." Gene barked back.

"You shouldn't be here, Guv, what if they find you, they're gonna look here for starters," said Shaz.

"Thank you for your pearls of wisdom, Granger, I bloody know that. I need to see 'er. Is she awake to get me out of this mess?"

"No, Guv, still out of it, nurse gave us a few minutes each, she's in there," offered Chris, signalling to the door of the side room.

Gene shot out into the corridor, "keep a look out," he ordered and entered the room.

He lingered at the door, then paced the room, unable to look at her fully. "Bolly, Bolly wake up. They think I shot yer, well I did shoot yer, but not like that. I'm a wanted man, on the lam. Me, a bloody DCI on the run, so you 'ave to wake up and tell them I never meant to. If I slap yer face will that help?" He finally stopped pacing and turned to face her. The sight of her took him aback, sleeping, almost angelic, the peace of her slumber occasionally disturbed as a flicker of life spread across her face and it contorted in pain or discomfort. Unable to resist he reached for her hand, grasping her fingers, "I can't lose you, Bolly, not now." He slumped down into the chair, burying his face in his palms. As he raised his head, his gaze flicked to her freshly bandaged body, a stark reminder of what he had done.

Calmer now, he brushed her cheek, and found it still warm, she was still fighting. "I'm sorry, for what I said, I thought...I thought you and me were...different, all that crap about the future, what am I meant to think? I just wanted the truth, I thought you trusted me. I trusted you. See this'll wake yer up, you were right, can't resist gloating at that can yer eh, Bols?" He let out a deep sigh, his heart heavy. "I 'ave to go, Bols, they catch me in 'ere I'm done for. Please, wake up, I need you. I..."

"Guv, they're coming you gotta go, now," said Ray appearing in the doorway. Gene nodded, and once Ray had disappeared again, he planted a soft kiss on her forehead. He paused to look at her for a moment, went to speak, but was again interrupted by DS Carling. "Guv, come on yer gotta move." With that he fled the scene.

**She believes in everything  
And she believes in nothing in everything  
**

Alex awoke, her hand instinctively reaching for her forehead, sure that Gene had just been there, that she could smell the faint traces of smoke and whiskey, hear his voice inches away, that she had just been that close to him. She had always believed that she was fighting to get home, but she had no idea where home was any more. You couldn't think this much about an imaginary construct, be hurt by them so deeply, care for them so much, love them. Alex didn't know what to believe anymore, who to believe. It whirled round in her head, Summers, Molly, Gene, nothing made sense, except her need for Molly and Gene to be in one place, any place, together. She whimpered his name as she battled in a restless sleep, attended by nurses. **  
**

**She has a halo**

Gene was haunted by the image of her still body as he ran, and he renewed his determination that she wasn't going to join the angels just yet.


End file.
